Motherhood and its antonym

Is this what they call motherhood? This feeling of being beside oneself with either worry or happiness for most of your waking, or for that matter, even sleeping moments? Is this what they call motherhood? The constant feeling of being more alive to each and every passing moment and also, at the very same time, the passing moment’s slipping away from your hands causing you to feel the fatality in its passing? Is this what they call motherhood? The forgetting oneself oh-so-thoroughly and also, at the same time, living life to the fullest, with each emotion heightened to exaggerated awareness? Is this what they call motherhood? The mirroring of a you’re my hero gaze in those believing eyes and the alternating how can you do this to me when a curfew installation is levied? Is this what they call motherhood? Immense exhilaration mixed with the heady fear of a thousand negative what-ifs? Is this what they call motherhood? The feeling of a quiet sense of patience and a stillness that runs deep alongside restlessness that hastens to increase the heartbeats and the rhythm of life beyond control? Is this what they call motherhood? The tearing apart of you v/s you and the uncertainty of whom you want to see wrestle out of this one? Is this what they call motherhood? The brazen confidence of I know how to handle this to the pendulum-ic hysteria of virginal fear arising out of inexperience? Is this what they call motherhood?

A layer of conflicting feelings, all stemming and procreating in the same environment making a heady cocktail mix that gives you an un-precedented high and also, the world’s worst hangover – all at the same time. Yup that’s what we call irresistible. Will not trade it for anything in the world – and this one, has no conflict within whatsoever.